Of Rings and XTremes
by DrawnToTheRhythm
Summary: My take on a possible scenario for episode ‘200’ Potential Season 10 spoilers


Of Rings and Things

RATING: PG

SEASON: Season 10

SPOILERS: Anything with 'Wormhole X-Treme' and spoilers for season 10

CATERGORY: Romance/Humour

PAIRING: Sam/Jack

SUMMARY: My take on a possible scenario for episode '200'

WARNINGS: none

DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. If I did Sam and Jack would be married with a daughter named Grace by now and Pete would never have existed.

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Colonel Danning peered around the corner to check that the aliens had been thrown off his scent before turning to Major Monroe.

"In case we don't make it I just wanted to say… I love you, Stacy! I've loved you ever since you challenged me to an arm wrestle!"

Stacy Monroe stared at him in amazement.

"Oh, Colonel, you don't know how long I've waited to hear you say that!"

She stared at him for a few seconds before grabbing his tac vest and planting a kiss on his lips.

"Is that your side arm or are you just happy to see me?"

General Jack O'Neill stood watching, horrified, from behind the camera.

"CUT!" He yelled, stepping onto the set and waving his arms above his head, causing the director to jump up from his seat nearby. "Ok, for a start you can't do that! It's against the Air Force rules and regulations, one of you has to resign first!"

Before the director could say a word, Yolanda sprinted over to Jack and began to vehemently protest.

"Resign? No way! Stacy's too valuable an asset to the team!"

Nick raised his hand.

"Uh, I'll do it!" He turned to face Jack, "I can still be civilian Colonel, right?"

Jack O'Neill rolled his eyes and smacked his palm against his forehead.

"Oh for cryin' out loud! NO! Look, you either have to transfer to another team or retire."

At that point, Raymond, having decided that his character was NOT getting enough screen time as it was, butted in.

"Yeah, but you married her, right?" He said matter-of-factly around a mouthful of doughnut whilst pointing to Carter.

Jack's eyebrows went through the roof.

"Urm, _excuse me_? Where did you get that idea?"

Raymond shrugged his shoulders.

"Well she's wearing a weddingring and you've got one to match it on your dogtags."

Jack automatically looked down at his dress uniform but his tags were under his shirt, firmly out of view.

"No, I don't!" He protested, his eyes shifting from Raymond to Sam to the rest of the room and then briefly to the floor.

Raymond gave him Daniel's trademark "Oh, _really_?" glare at which point Jack wondered exactly how many times Daniel had been to visit the set himself in order to teach him that!

"Oh, I suppose I just imagined seeing you tuck it back into your shirt collar after you showed Nick how to do that flip-thingy?"

"Yeah, you did!" Jack yelled a little louder than was necessary as he yanked Raymond's glasses off his face "I think you need to visit your optometrists to have these checked!"

Yolanda, however, decided at that moment that she wanted answers.

"Excuse me? Could we just clarify here? I'm not allowed to marry him but you," she said, glancing at Sam, "married him?" Yolanda then turned to Marty and put her hands on her hips "Does that mean I'm gonna get locked up? I mean, on the show? Coz I have a contract until the end on next season!"

Realising he needed to stop this and fast, Jack cleared his throat loudly.

"Will you all just STOP with the crazy talk and let me finish? OK, I said you can't do that, end of story! And, yes Ray-ban, you need new glasses!" Raymond frowned at the mispronunciation of his name, "Now, anything else?"

Everyone shook their heads with the exception of the Director who threw down his clipboard and stomped off set.

"Good! Now, play nice whilst I go and get some coffee! Carter?"

Sam's head shot up.

"Yes, Sir?"

"Keep any eye on them. If they so much as stand closer than two feet together..."

Sam nodded the affirmative, glad that she finally had an order to follow instead of trying hard not to laugh at Jack's reaction.

"Yes, Sir!"

As the General walked off in search of coffee, Yolanda took the opportunity to interrogate Carter.

"So, Colonel, tell me, what does it feel like to be tortured? I'm doing a scene where Stacy's ..."

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Sam walked up behind Jack who was standing behind one of their military-issue sedans and coughed loudly to announce her presence. Not that it was necessary.

"Sir?"

The General turned around to face her and removed his sunglasses.

"Carter!" He glanced around to check that the parking lot was empty before he continued. "So, what is it tonight? Chinese or Italian?"

Sam handed him her house keys.

"Italian sounds good! They're packing up for the day. They've got to do some re-writes, the Danning/Monroe storyline was apparently pivotal to the entire plot!"

"Ah, well, you know what they say about dress blues and gold wings..."

Sam leaned closer to him to whisper in his ear conspiratorily.

"Um, Jack, I think it's dress whites and gold wings but I take your point. See you at home, say, 1900?"

Jack tossed the keys in the air and caught them before smirking.

"Yasureyabetcha, Snookums!"

As Sam went to walk away, she couldn't resist having the final word.

"For the record, Sir, I don't think you had Raymond fooled for a second!"

Jack just stared open-mouthed as his wife made her way across the parking lot to her Volvo. Oh, he'd show her how convincing he could be when he chose to! He jumped in his sedan and sped home as fast as his car would allow him to, breathing a sigh of relief that he'd beaten Sam to the door. When he heard the sounds of Sam's Volvo pulling into the drive. He watched in silence as she walked up the path and withdrew her spare set of keys from her purse. Jack's sedan was nowhere to be seen and she was wondering what was taking him so long. No sooner had she opened the door, a pair of hands grabbed her and dragged her over the threshold. Sam gasped before a pair of lips descended upon hers, leaving her breathless.

Suddenly the "stranger" pulled back and in the dim evening light she could see the face of one Jack O'Neill looking extremely smug.

"So, did I convince you?"

Sam looked puzzled.

"Oh, for cryin' out loud, Sam, I love you!"

Sam giggled.

"Your plan was to convince me that you _love_ me? Well, then, yes, Jack, you have convinced me!" she said, half-mockingly. "Of course, I think this ring might have given me a clue…" Sam's expression suddenly changed to one of mischief. "On second thoughts, I'm not entirely sure I believe you. I might need a bit more… convincing."

"Then convince you, I shall!" Jack announced before scooping Sam into his arms and carrying her to the bedroom, the meal completely forgotten.

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Please review with blue jell-o on top:D


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